I went to the Paralympics and all I got was a sunburnt nose.

(Which is now peeling)

As mentioned in my HOW WILL I COPE WITHOUT THE OLYMPICS post, we got tickets to the Paralympics. My love for the Olympics and Paralympics (inexplicable as I can’t usually watch sport at all without wandering off or falling asleep) was so great that I got up at FIVE on Thursday morning to go to the Paralympics and sit in that Olympic stadium and actually go to the place where all the exciting stuff is happening. Going to the Paralympics more than made up for the greatest tragedy of my childhood – never going to the millennium dome.

 

Being in the actual Olympic stadium was properly surreal and even I looked at the track I couldn’t believe I was actually seeing it. We were in there for nearly four hours so I did manage to get used to it enough to calm down and actually properly look at it. On the telly, the athletes seem much much bigger in proportion to the stadium. In the stadium it looks like you are watching some very colourful ants running and jumping and throwing big chunks of metal.

We mostly saw heats of 100m, 200m etc. I don’t remember the specifics but it was really exciting. We saw Hannah Cockcroft in a heat and Tatiana McFadden win a gold. We also got to see Oscar Pistorious receive a gold medal as part of the South African relay team. I WAS AT THE SAME ADDRESS AS OSCAR! There was also some shotput and discus going on... but it was pretty difficult to see any of that.

By the FAR the best part was the F11 Triple jump final. The F11 category is for athletes with little or no sight, they manage to do the triple jump because they have a guide who stands by the run-up and claps to the jumper knows where to start jumping. Because of all the clapping, the whole stadium had to fall into silence which was so strange. I have never been in a place with so many people with so little noise. It was like everyone in the stadium was holding their breath.  Li Dong, one of the Chinese competitors, would rip off his tracksuit bottoms stripper-style before each jump. Everyone loved him.

I look like that because I had been up since FIVE and I'd slept with wet hair the night before

The ONLY downside was not having a single Tory politician to boo. I am almost sure I saw a slightly stubbley and bespectacled Chris Addison going in as we left the Olympic park! I have no proof but I’m pretty happy to believe it. 

HOW WILL I COPE WITHOUT THE OLYMPICS?

 

I have been IN LOVE with the Olympics this last fortnight. From the moment Kenneth Branagh came out in his top hat and said:

Be not afeard; the isle is full of noises,

Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.

Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments

Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices

That, if I then had waked after long sleep,

Will make me sleep again: and then, in dreaming,

The clouds methought would open and show riches

Ready to drop upon me that, when I waked,

I cried to dream again.

Thank God for the Paralympics because there's no way I could deal with the whole thing being over. I don't even like sport!

My favourite bits of the Olympics

 

The Opening Ceremony

I am OBSESSED with the opening ceremony, I watched it TWICE and didn’t stop talking about it for about a week. Could it have been better? It was a vision of the Britain we all love:

The NHS – everyone knows the NHS is the greatest thing this country has ever created and the Opening Ceremony celebrated it with DANCING doctors and nurses.

The QUEEN in a skit. THE QUEEEN.

We have the best music EVER

We (well, Tim Berners-Lee) created THE INTERNET (well the part for ordinary people to use) and he gave it to the world FOR FREE. WEEEP.

J K Rowling reading Peter Pan

Suffragettes

The Windrush generation

A CLIP FROM GREGORY’S GIRL

And JOY

The country would be much happier if we just lived in a version of the opening ceremony all the time! We just need to gather up all the Tories and Daily Mail readers (ie. the ones who ruin everything), put them in a boat and let them go off to seek their fortunes in new places. Bit harsh?

I love sport (apparently)

A sporting event other than Wimbledon was interesting to me for the first time EVER. I was so addicted to the Olympics that I felt twitchy when I knew I was missing the Olympics. We are THIRD in the medal table. THIRD. How on earth has this happened? Have you seen how small we are? 

My family have been so swept up by Olympic excitement that we actually went down to Hyde Park to see the Men's triathlon go by and wave flags.

All the women!

I've never seen women's sport has never been given this much love and attention.  Aside from all the amazing achievements of the women in Team GB, this is the first year that women have competed in every single sport and the first year than every country has sent a female athlete. Someone left flowers on Emmeline Pankhurst's grave in recognition of that fact

Claire Balding

The BEST Olympic presenter. 

IT'S NOT EVEN OVER! 

We have the paralympics to look forward to and I'm going WOOOOO.

It's time for me to go and watch the Closing Ceremony and eat the most massive bowl of ice cream. Fingers crossed for David Bowie singing Heroes and Kate Bush.