The Orange Book - part 2

Thursday 6^th Sept 2001

Frances gave me a picture of X!!

LH has got a boyfriend. Lucky bitch.

Depressed I have no boyfriend. I will never have a boyfriend. I am hopelessly in love with someone I can’t have.

X is so good looking! (I just looked at the picture)

Jenny gave us pencils with Barbie heads on (from a toyshop!!!)

LH and I talked about boys and she was kinda surprised said – “Haven’t you [got a boyfriend]?!” Does this means she thinks I should? Was being nice? Or just thinks everyone has??

Tomorrow we have:

Science

Geog

Art

P.E.

THEN HOMEY HOME!

To chocolate and TV  (and noise and basooma measuring)

I don’t know why I don’t just give up with X but I can’t. Anyway, I quite enjoy it.

Friday 7^th Sept

10.44pm 

I had a very strange dream last night. I was in a car with Granny and Joyce [My granny’s best friend] when SG [ friend of X] stopped us and said he needed to talk to me in private! It turned out that X had found an old game of consequences which had upset him and he wouldn’t leave his house! I was needed to make everything better.

Frances and B.T. reckon that the boys all look like penguins. (Didn’t see MY penguin)

I want to be in love

I WANT TO HAVE A SEXY BOYFRIEND

I am attempting to be intellectual so I am watching Newsnight Review. It is quite reassuring. That Miranda Something is on it. [I mean Miranda Sawyer]I want my hair like hers.

All the things they’re talking about have to do with SEX!

Oh well! Hey ho!

I watched AB FAB... was AB FAB!

Saturday 8^th Sept

NEXT WEEK IS THE LAST LIVE AND KICKING (what a shame!*)

Mum wants my basomas to be measured.  I’m wearing a thin top so I might not have to take it off.

Mine is not the first heart broken

My eyes are not the first to cry

I’m not the first to know there’s just no getting over youuu

Because I’m hopelessly devoted to yoouuuuuuuuu

BUT NOW THERE’S NOWHERE TO HIDE

SINCE YOU PUSHED MY LOVE ASIDEE

OOOH I’M OUT OF MY HEADDD!

HOPELESSLY DEVOTED TO YOU-OO-OO-OO!

Sorry.

I’ve got to work out what people do at night. Might ring Laura later.

Sunday 9^th Sept

12.14am

Been watching a crap film.

Me and mum are going to town TODAY.

10.41pm

Went to Oxford to be measured!

It wasn’t that bad. Nice woman .

34 wait for it.... D! [I WAS TWELVE. I think I just wandered about the shop sobbing]

Wednesday 12^th Sept

I was embarrassed by my basoomas AGAIN:

Numero uno: Becky from stageschool said, “Look at that girl’s chest!” to her friend. I was sooo embarrassed.

Then I was crossing the road this weird guy kept looking at my basoomas! 

I think I saw X!

...but then again I might not have.

We had business studies!!!!

Yesterday two aeroplanes crashed into The World Trade Centre in New York! Over 25,000 people have been killed. I am going to e-mail Aoife.

Sent Aoife a very long e-mail.

Mum knows, and I mean KNOWS

But it’s ok.

Thursday 13^th Sept

School is SHITTY SHITTY SHITTY.

Mum just came back from a yr8 welcome evening (/parenting lecture) where they were told to look out for signs of drug taking! Warned of the perils of teen mags and told the school are going to poke their noses in at every opportunity.

I’m going to buy loads of teen mags to go away with.

Otherwise boring day.

Friday 14^th Sept

Saw №1 Penguin looking yummy. He kinda saw me. From now on Friday is chippy and boywatching night! Just me and Laura today though.

In France we’re going to be allowed to wear make-up! Me and Jenny are going to wear chiffon scarves all the time. It’s going to be so cool, Normandy what’s hit it when 170 teenage girls appear! In a way X looks kinda French.....

Monday 17^th Sept

I saw X today. We crossed the road at the same time and so Frances had to push me into him. I just laughed and don’t think he noticed.

Tuesday 18^th Sept

My life is over.

I expect X knows I fancy him and he thinks I’m sad. Well that’s the impression I get but it might be an act. But I doubt it.

He and his mates were laughing at me which is not good.

But it may just be in my imagination.

Issi’s mad.

I’m sure X hates me. And people I don’t even know keep laughing at me! Is this because of my breathtaking beauty?  Or because I have a green face or something and haven’t noticed?

Neither. I am UGLY so very UGLY.

Men are soo groovy and sexy looking...even when they hate you.

I love X’s groovy, sexy, husky voice. It’s probably just lust.

He is sooooooooo sexy and groovy looking.. with that voice! Uh! And that hair! Mmmmmmm!  He is so groovy YUM. OH MY GOD SO GORGEOUS. But he will never love me ever, ever, ever, ever, ever.

I’m now v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v depressed because he’s so v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v. sexy groovy and yummmmm.

Wednesday 19^th Sept

Yesterday was being followed by some very strange boys. V.v.v.v.v.v.v.v.v. funny.

Thursday 20^th Sept

Craponious life.

Saw Mr Sex BOMBE

Ignored me... I think. I’m sure when I went under the bridge I heard someone say, “she’s in year eight” about me!!

Me, Laura and Amy were delivering these thingy paper whatsits, and we were doing funny walks down the road and I looked up and saw J.R. looking through the window at us! Then I looked up again and J.G. and J.R. were both looking at us!

I LOVE X

Frances reckons that he was showing off the other day.... FOR ME!

Friday 21^st Sept

In the car. Very bored. Couldn’t see Mr SEXE BOMBE (AKA la no.1 penguin). The car stinks. Sam’s snivelling in my ear. YUCK. YUCK. YUCK.

Tres distressing and sheer desperados very very bored.

Saturday 22^nd Sept

SAM TRIED TO KILL ME. TELL YOU TOMORROW. [this is never explained]

Tuesday 25^th Sept

Went to meeting about school show. HE WASN’T THERE. NOT FAIR.

Mr Willett woofed at Alex when she walked passed.

Frances was Ill today. I missed her.

Issi Abandoned me this morning.

Why has no one heard of Nancy Mitford?

Last night I dreamt I was little Mo from Eastenders and that I got loads of presents from this guy for going on a website about domestic violence. One of the presents was some sanitary towels.

BYEEE

Wednesday 26^th Sept

Went to the youth club! Absolutely CRAPONIOUS! OH MY GOD! I got called a freak! Not very nice.

Next time: we got to France!