I know it’s over

This Monday list is the most needed list so far as today is my first Monday after a week off. In all honesty I don't know how I'll make myself log back into my work computer and get back into my thrilling job.

THE JOY LIST:

Annual Leave

Just being able to book a week off work for no particular reason must be one of the greatest pleasures. There's nothing better than just being. I went for runs, I read books, I actually got to hang out with my boyfriend, I ate yummy meals, and I watched Star Wars for the first time.

Roxane Gay's Outlander recaps

As a fully obsessed Jamie Perv Outlander fan, Roxane Gay's Outlander recaps on the Butter are the best. Here are her most recent ones - Unruly Women are Always Witches  and When My Uterus Began Throbbing in Earnest

Running

I must run odd routes because everyone else has a lovely loop and I have that weird shape.

Shall I pretend that it was wondrous and amazing? I went armed with Laura's Best Ever Running Playlist and a newly downloaded Nike Running app so I was inspired and I felt a little bit more like a runner because I'm now keeping proper record of my routes and times and things like that.

This awesome thing on tumblr: Things I Associate with Hogwarts Houses

Laura showed me this on Sunday when I was actually watching Harry Potter in my Hogwarts jumper. A lot of Harry Potter goes on in my home - my boyfriend has a Deathly Hallows tattoo ffs. This list of things the author associates with each house is excellent and I want to print it out and stick it up by my desk.  I'm weird and I love Harry Potter so much I could cry. 

Spring Cleaning

I have been spring cleaning (as mentioned last week) and now our box room, which had become a scary no man's land of boxes and random junk, has turned back into the room with a desk, printer, massive bookcases, and now (thanks to Paul) an exercise bike. This means I have somewhere to sit with all my notebooks and pretend I'm blogging or working on a project of some kind. It mostly means we can put the airer up in here.

LIPSTICK

Love love love the packaging for the one on the left

I am a littttle bit skint at the moment but thanks to some giftcards that I've been squirrelling away I ordered some new lipsticks. I got Victoriana from the MAC Toledo collection and the most classic MAC lipstick of all – Ruby Woo. I love them. Lipstick is such a lovely joyful thing.

This article: Why we should embrace 'plus-size'. not seek to ban the term. 

This is about the recent Drop the plus campaign that seeks to drop the plus (duh,.. I should write this better) from plus-size fashion and modelling. It argues that the issue with 'plus' is the ingrained fatphobia in our society and dropping the label won't magically make that go away - "the problem isn’t with the word "plus" but with the extreme cultural fear of being seen and recognised as fat." Bethany Rutter, the author of the article, has excellent style blog - Arched Eyebrow 

ASMR VIDEOS

I saw a ridiculous video where Russell Brand was trying to say that ASMR is like porn for women because we are more complex and subtle and can therefore derive sensual pleasure from ASMR videos which men, ie. Brand, cannot because they have been dulled by porn. It was something like that, I didn't watch the whole video because it was too stupid. But anyway. ASMR stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response and it's basically it is a super tingly feeling of relaxation that you get from certain sounds or certain kinds of attention from another person. I experience it in real life in places like the hairdressers, especially when I'm having my hair washed and head massaged, or the opticians having an eye test. I thought this feeling was something everyone experienced - I thought that was the whole reason people get massages! But it turns out that it isn't that common. The only other person I know who experiences it is my dad.

So ASMR videos? YouTube is full of videos of very calm women doing things every quietly in the hope of triggering ASMR. There are roleplay videos where they will act out scenarios where asmr is common – eye tests, hair and make-up consultations, hotel reception, travel agent etc. There are other videos that are more like demonstrations of things like towel folding (surprisingly popular), crafts, recipes and unboxing packages. The final kind of ASMR video is the weirdest and just features certain sounds like crinkling plastic or whispering certain words. I can't imagine what it's like to come across these videos if you don't know what they are!

Some videos are really high quality and take a lot of time and effort. This one by YouTuber Ally aka ASMR requests is amazing and one of my favourites:

I don't really understand ASMR but it is the most relaxing thing ever. If you experience it, watching a video that triggers your ASMR can help you sleep, relax you after a shitty day and even help get rid of a headache. I know all of those things are things that sex is good for as well, but ASMR really isn't a sexual thingm despite what Russell Brand may try to say. It's not about being excited by people folding towels, it's about comfort and feeling safe and looked after.

Here is another one of my all-time favourite ASMR videos:

*side note: remember when Russell Brand seemed funny and interesting and oddly sexy? It's a shame he has become a massive twat…or that I've grown up and realised he is one.